This is Kind of an Epic Love Story wrung my heart out to dry. It was full of all those decisions that are borne of fear, of questionable origins, and of love.
Nathan Bird doesn’t believe in happy endings.
Although he’s the ultimate film buff and an aspiring screenwriter, Nate’s seen the demise of too many relationships to believe that happy endings exist in real life.
Playing it safe to avoid a broken heart has been his MO ever since his father died and left his mom to unravel—but this strategy is not without fault. His best-friend-turned-girlfriend-turned-best-friend-again, Florence, is set on making sure Nate finds someone else. And in a twist that is rom-com-worthy, someone does come along: Oliver James Hernández, his childhood best friend.
After a painful mix-up when they were little, Nate finally has the chance to tell Ollie the truth about his feelings. But can Nate find the courage to pursue his own happily ever after?
Nate is a character I immediately empathized with. He has this easy going way about him, combined with a genuine vulnerability. And what makes him more relatable, is that his vulnerability is so essential. So universal. He doesn’t want to be hurt. Don’t we all? It’s a challenge to let people in. To recognize their capacity to hurt you, to love you, and to leave you.
There were those moments where you lie when you say you’re over someone. When you want to get sucked into the floor of embarrassment. When your body can’t stop humming from a crush.
Not only that, but there was tons of diversity. There’s a deaf character, queer people of color, and queer relationships. All the diversity. It was fabulous and affirming to read.
But paired with that, there’s this genuine wealth of feelings. Nate is afraid, terrified, of getting hurt. But he has to ask himself at the end of the day, is love, genuine connection, worth it? It’s hard to process, to come to terms with what we want. And can we actualize what we want, or do we let it go?
I’ve had moments where I’ve convinced myself that I don’t want something because the desire is so strong, I’m worried acknowledging it will swallow me whole. That the disappointment when I don’t get it, is going to crush me.
Something I also loved is that Nate struggles with wondering if he his voice matters to put it forth into the world. That feeling is something I empathize so much with, even with this blog. Are my thoughts, my reviews, worthy enough to be put into the web? Do my feelings matters? My reviews make a difference?
This is Kind of an Epic Love Story pains the picture of the way words and worlds spiral out of control when we are in love. And it asks us if we come together out of fate or through force of will? Can we take our own agency and make our love story an epic one?
Have you ever struggled with wondering if you voice mattered?
Follow Utopia State of Mind on WordPress.com